Let's hope it was just Cheney trying to flush out an unauthorized leaker.

Interesting Times: George Packer: Online Only: The New Yorker

Test Marketing

If there were a threat level on the possibility of war with Iran, it might have just gone up to orange. Barnett Rubin, the highly respected Afghanistan expert at New York University, has written an account of a conversation with a friend who has connections to someone at a neoconservative institution in Washington. Rubin can’t confirm his friend’s story; neither can I. But it’s worth a heads-up:

True? I don’t know. Plausible? Absolutely. It follows the pattern of the P.R. campaign that started around this time in 2002 and led to the Iraq war. The President’s rhetoric on Iran has been nothing short of bellicose lately, warning of “the shadow of a nuclear holocaust.” And the Iranian government’s behavior—detaining British servicemen and arresting American passport holders, pushing ahead with uranium enrichment, and, by many reliable accounts, increasing its funding and training for anti-American militias in Iraq—seems intentionally provocative. Perhaps President Ahmedinejad and the mullahs feel that they win either way: they humiliate the superpower if it doesn’t take the bait, and they shore up their deeply unpopular regime at home if it does. Preëmptive war requires calculations (and, often, miscalculations) on two sides, not just one, as Saddam learned in 2003. When tensions are this high between two countries and powerful factions in both act as if hostilities are in their interest, war is likely to follow.

High school journalism students graded on ad revenue

"I don't think it's such a big deal," said student Courtney Dahl.

"It shouldn't be a problem. There's so many people that would buy a page or something, doesn't bother me," said Dahl.

Don't forget to wear a tank top with no bra while you're selling your journalism ad space, Courtney. That's good practice for the pros, too.

If you don't mind having to think, you should read this posting. It is, at last, a consolidated explanation of how so-called "professional journalism" has always been co-opted by owners, editors and advertisers.

On the flip side, it's also a clear explanation for why citizen reporters in the blogsphere have become both indispensable to Journalism and the people they serve as well as a threat to Big Media's status quo.

Thomas Paine's Corner

Dry up the tears for that golden period in US Journalism that never was

There’s a widespread assumption in left wing circles that increasing concentration of media ownership is, ipso facto, the main if not sole culprit for the appalling performance of mainstream journalism in our time...

Emblematic of the media’s attitude, on January 3, the day after the raids, The New York Times reported the roundup of “2,000 Reds” putatively involved in a “a vast working plot to overthrow the government.” The headline read: “REDS PLOTTED COUNTRY-WIDE STRIKE–ARRESTS EXCEED 5,000–2,635 HELD.”

Those of you (poor bastards all) who have been around The Exclusive Blog at Panzo.org since the very beginning may well remember the early attempt that was made at "mascotting" the blog.

Both of you know the story behind Panzo.org and the mistakenly-heard "Panzo The Dancing Bear" and, indeed, a dancing bear was our first attempt at having a mascot.

PTDB became the logo mascot for TEBaP.o, gracing the backs of t-shirts as well as the site itself.

Then one day, someone pointed out to me that a "bear" in a tutu might be construed as being a bit gay-culturish. "Bears" are big, hairy gay men. Tutus are, well, pretty damn girly.

So PTDB bid everyone a hasty "so-long" and waddled off into the sunset.

The original PTDB wasn't the only one, however. I thought both of you would like to see PTDB's evolution.

Hey, I'm no artist (obviously) but I did a credible job imbuing this bear with a sense of playful freedom which is, as you know, the hallmark of TEBaP.o.

I thought he looked just fine but Miss SO deemed him "too anime".

I don't know what's wrong with that but, as I do too often, I deferred to her.

Hungee didn't really look right to me, though. Giant penises are humorous and he was funny enough but I had doubts whether anyone would want to wear a well-endowed bear on their person. I finally decided against Hungee but here he is, like Rasputin, well hung and well-preserved..

My next brainstorm was almost the winner.

Damn near perfect, was BB Bear. Posed on the proper posture for enjoying TEBaP.o, unashamed of a body built by years of libation and greasy food, and just tousled enough to be "cute".

Unfortunately, word of BB Bear leaked out to the general press and a campaign was started by Iris Bigelow of Muncie, Indiana to curb the use of giant-stomached cartoon animals as web site mascots. People for The Ethical Treatment of Cartoon Animals (PETCA) stepped into the fray and I quietly shut down production of the BB Bear product line.

So, there you have it. A short trip down Nostalgia Avenue in the annals of The Exclusive Blog at Panzo.org.

I can remember, when I was a kid, one of the things we always did was talk about the things we'd have and be in the future.

I was pretty sure that I'd have a customized van at some point but I don't recall ever having a preferred profession.

People were older when I was a kid. If you were in your forties back in the early 1970's when I was a kid, you were damn near ancient. Now, thanks to the internet and mass media, forty is the new twenty.

That may be, but the new twenty comes with two fives and a couple of singles in its back pocket.

This is just an early morning rambly-ramble so don't expect much.

In fact, don't expect anything at all.

That's forty-four for you.

As Prostitutes Turn to Craigslist, Law Takes Notice

The real penalties are the disruption of business, the cost of lawyers and the seizures of computers and cash — as much as several thousand dollars at a time. The police say the focus on such misconduct is worthwhile because prostitution is often linked to other crimes involving drugs, weapons, physical abuse and exploitation of minors and immigrants.

Oh yeah. It's about protecting the poor, independent sex worker and not about the "several thousand dollars at a time" that the cops confiscate to fatten their budget for cop-toys.

Seizure laws need to be wiped off the books. How fair is it to create incentives for the cops to go after only the most lucrative criminals? If these women were trading baseball cards for sex, not a cop would care.

Her Body: The Perils of 'Designer Vaginas'

Last week the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) Committee on Gynecologic Practice issued a statement to its members warning about the dangers of trying to create "designer vaginas" through procedures that purport to trim and slim the vaginal lips, tighten the vagina or add extra bounce to the G-spot with injectable materials like collagen.

Trim and slim the vaginal lips? What's next? The Jenny Craig 30-day Vaginal Lips Diet? The Tai-Bo Vaginal Lip Workout? Richard Simmons' Lip Up and Live?

Ladies, who the hell is critiquing those things? "Oh Marge! Just look at my fat vaginal lips! How will I ever land a man with beefy meat curtains like these?!"

Is there a lot of relationship abandonment happening out there over this? "I'm sorry, Midge but I'm leaving you for Marcia. Her vaginal lips are small, trim and fold neatly back along my shaft. I...I'm sorry."

Do women really need bouncier G-spots? Is it an erogenous zone or a trampoline? Are women sitting around in the gym locker room lamenting the flat feeling to their unadulterated squirt button? Personally, I'd worry that I'd nail the spot only to bounce off and get shot across the god damned room!

Seriously, ladies...Most of you are just fine. Ease off of this false self improvement. Concentrate on yourselves in other ways. Rather than surgically altering your clam flaps in order to try to attract and keep a man, just learn how to make a better blueberry crumble.

Justice Department Nixes Net Neutrality, Government Says ISPs Should Be Allowed To Charge A Fee For Priority Web Traffic

The Justice Department on Thursday said Internet service providers should be allowed to charge a fee for priority Web traffic.

The agency told the Federal Communications Commission, which is reviewing high-speed Internet practices, that it is opposed to "Net neutrality," the principle that all Internet sites should be equally accessible to any Web user.

...

The agency said providing different levels of service is common, efficient and could satisfy consumers.

Get ready to start paying a premium to access more popular we sites, a la your wonderfully tiered cable TV service.

"No, I'm sorry. The onion.com site is available only on our $79.99 a month Preferred Packet Plan".

Imagine your telephone service provider being allowed to charge you more for access to certain exchanges that are popular. "We're sorry. Your call cannot be placed to California exchange 916 at this time. California exchange 916 is only available to customers who opt for our Dubious Dialing plan. If you would like to pay a one-time access fee of $5.99 by credit or debit card in order to complete your call, please press 5 now."

Worse than that, if 'Net neutrality is lost, internet providers will be able to censor web sites by not carrying them. Did Comcast get a scathing review from cableaccess.com? Well, goodbye cableaccess.com.

Censorship of that kind wouldn't stop at just sites critical of the provider. How easy would it be for providers to strangle free political speech on the Internet by refusing to carry Daily Kos or Little Green Footballs? "In order to give our customers more choice, AT&T will no longer be providing access to 'thedrudgereport.com'".

It's unfathomable that the American government would agree with stifling freedom - right now you can get any website that exists - by recommending that providers be allowed pick and choose which web site to provide access to.

Everyone loves a Monday holiday.

Ah yes, but what usually follows is five days of shit in a four day bag.

What transpired over my work week was a blur of crazy homeless people, bums, screwy elevators, dopey roofers, clogged terlets and too many good-looking women in skirts.

Tuesday brought us a homeless stripper who had to have the police called on her and who left in an aid car but who was back again yesterday, muttering to herself and taking up bench space.

Wednesday brought us a parking-challenged roofer who couldn't find any of several spaces pointed out to him who apparently wasn't needed at all because my boss didn't want a quote on repairs, he just wanted a 6-inch split patches which is something we could have don with a can of chewing gum base.

Thursday brought a lot of hated phone work and a clogged terlet that had to ultimately be removed and then snaked by a Rooter company with a camera. My boss was unhappy that he'd missed a simple wad of paper towels with both a closet snake and one of those hand spinner snakes. The wad was bumped by the RooterCam and went on down the line.

Friday brought a broken key access on one elevator that disabled it and the discovery of a two-year old foot of water in the pit of another elevator. We sump pumped the water out and now all is reasonably well. But then I didn't eat lunch until after 1PM and was good for nothing for the rest of the day.

Today brings a busman's holiday as I have to go down and change the garbage cans because last week was the last week for the weekend help. I have to do it again tomorrow as well, since it's going to be a very nice weekend. While down there, Miss Significantly Other and me are going to see what the Salmon Homecoming Festival looks like in Homeless park - I mean Waterfront Park.

Sure, it'll be 2 hours of OT and 28 reimbursed miles but it still sucks to have to go to work on your days off.

Kyla Ebbert.

Hooters.

23.

Slutty clothes.

South West Airlines.

Prudish Homo.

Tongue lashing.

Cover up.

Media run.

Fifteen minutes.

National hero.

No class.

Bimbo.

At the risk of speaking too soon, we are coming off of an infestation of green blowflies.

For two years running, we had wasps flying out of our fireplace in the spring. This year, no wasps (well, two but that's comparatively like none). Howsomever, on Thursday evening, I noticed a couple of flies buzzing around.

Normally, flies are OK because Hoku the Omak Cat hunts them down and stomps them and that's great fun. So I didn't pay it any mind until Friday afternoon when there were four or five of them on the inside of our sliding door. And then Saturday morning there were nine on the inside of our kitchen window screen alone.

Saturday night, remembering the wasps coming out of the fireplace (the chimney sweeps swore that the stack was clear), I sealed it with a split trash bag and some tape.

Sunday we had five or six and then today we've only had three that I counted. I have no idea where they could have come from, except for the roof.

Blowflies eat shit. And garbage. And dead things. We don't have any of any of that stuff laying around, fly-accessible. But up on the roof, dead things can live up there.

I want to go up and look but Miss Significantly Other doesn't want to. All right. But next time...

Other than that, the weekend was normal. We went down to Waterfront Park to check out the native stuff and got to see a couple of Mexican native Indians demonstrate their dances.

We ate lunch at T&T Seafood Restaurant which is a Chinese joint in the Ranch 99 shopping center. Miss SO had the duck soup and I had a day at the races. Er, no. I had the beef chow mein with cripsy noodles and satay sauce. It was pretty darn tasty. The service was terrible, though.

Yesterday we tried UnPhoGettable which is a VietTeriyaki joint on the corner of Greenwood and Holman Road. This joint has had about six different owners in the last six years but its teriyaki has always been reliably the same sweet yumminess. Sadly, I must report that the run is over.

What I got in my foam container was dry chicken (that took fifteen minutes to prepare), a bit of lettuce with a tiny amount of teriyaki shop style dressing, a glop of rice and a small container of watery, spicey sauce. All I can hope is that the sauce was wrong and I got the dipping sauce instead.

Ah well. All good things and so on.

The Official Weight Loss Blog for Valerie Bertinelli -- Jenny Craig

Yes, that's jennycraig.com you see in the link above. Why? Well, because I have had a super-duper-whooper-mega-hubba-hubba crush on Valerie Bertinelli since the first day I saw her on that 70's sitcom "One Day At A Time".

And now, (sing the Mokees song with me, damnit!) "I love her Vah-ah-ah-ah-al-erie" is doing the JC thang to lose weight.

So she's airbrushed a bit and nipped an tucked some. So she's three years older than I am. So she made a terrible mistake and married Eddie Van Halen instead of me.

I can't help it. I still get all cow-eyed over her.

I just ran into her on a JC ad while looking up nutritional information. Man, she's looking sexolicious! Valerie, I'd still kiss your whole face!

So my cardiac C-reactive protein is slightly more than twice "normal". So that puts me in the highest "quintile" for risk of Sudden Keeling Syndrome. So a little bird landed on my shoulder on Monday evening and screamed in my ear, "YO! TIME FOR A CHANGE, ASSHOLE!"

So I'm gym shopping. Actually, before that, I bought a basketball months ago with an eye toward actually using the thing. Really. As a basketball, too.

I pumped it up Monday evening and went down to a nearby neighborhood park (our park doesn't have a b-ball court). It was a warm Seattle evening and there were, of course, kids playing on the court. They weren't playing basketball but I'm not going to end their game of Run Around Until I'm Dizzy And Throw Up My Pork Chops just so I can hobble around to play some Waddleball.

So I drove a few thousand blocks north to a pretty big church/school that has a huge, paved playground with multiple backboards. There's never anyone there when we drive by so I figure that's primo. I pull up to the open gate and notice for the first time that there's a sign next to it. The sign says that the open, empty playground in this residential area is restricted to students and that anyone else is trespassing. Jesus loves you too, jerkfaces.

So I drove a thousand and a half blocks south again to a leetle Christian church that has a single backboard set up in their fenced-in parking lot. I waddled around for about twenty minutes, helplessly tossing the ball into the air.

Then, the Cub Scouts attacked me. Ok, they didn't attack me but they poured out of the church and into the parking lot for "Unless We Run These Kids Silly, The Scoutmaster Is Going To Kill Them" time. As I passed the man, he nicely informed me that they wouldn't be very long if I wanted to hang around. I thanked him but told him it was already past my bed time.

So last night I went back to shoot some baskets or, as I like to call it, "Throw The Orange Ball Skyward" and the parking lot was empty except for a cop who was apparently watching the church to see if Jesus was going to show. He waved at me and I commenced to go one-on-one with the asphalt.

(An aside - the house behind the hoop has hugefuckingmongous holly "trees" that hang over the lot fence and have shed a bazillion dead leaves onto the ground behind the pole. Dried holly leaves, if you didn't know, are basically oval pieces of cardboard with number ten sewing needles embedded in them. The leaves stick into the skin of the ball and, I found out just a hair too late, into the skin af the ball handler.)

So I finally drove off the cop when I accidentally got the ball close enough to the hoop to thunk it against the front edge, causing a massive rebounding failure on my part and sending the ball skidding under the police cruiser to meet with its differential, "thud".

Deciding that he wasn't going to become just another statistic in the war against Waddleball, the cop left. I continued throwing the ball into the air until it bounced over the fence and into the neighbor's yard making me suddenly 12 years old and without a clue as what to do.

I finally walked around the lot and along the side of the house to retrieve the ball from under the Killer Holly but I was expecting to come off of the property with either a growling dog on my leg or a new buckshot pattern in my sweats.

But nothing happened.

So I went up to Gold's Gym to see if they had any kind of printed information about memberships but, of course, they didn't. I hate that these places want to sell you face-to-face. I like to get my info and then make my decision. I don't need any help.

Which brings me to why I started writing this entry. 24 Hour Fitness in Shoreline is too god damned aggressive! Way back when Miss Significantly Other and I were gym shopping together (we settled on Olympic in Ballard but that was back in the heady days when we had money), we stopped at 24 Hour Fitness in Shoreline just to gather some info. You know - comparison shop?

The assistant whatever who trapped us at his desk was adamant that we leave a deposit that day. We tried explaining to him that we were still shopping but, of course, he was offering us a deal that couldn't be guaranteed if we waited. After complaining to his supervisor that we felt more like we were at a used car lot than a health club, we left.

Last night I printed out a 7-day free pass to 24 Hour Fitness in Shoreline, having confused it with another gym. Less than two hours later, "Ben" was calling me on the phone, "wondering when they could expect me". Well Ben, if you're going to hassle me before I'm even in the place, how does "never" sound?

OK. Time to go. Talk amongst yourselves.

Democrats Reject General's Iraq Plan

The goal is to attract enough Republicans to break the 60-vote threshold in the Senate needed to end a filibuster. Democrats have proved unable to do that since they took control of Congress eight months ago.

Filibuster?! You mean that parliamentary tool that the Republicans wanted to do away with when the Democrats used it against them?

Even for Washington D.C. that's a new way to weasel.

THE WAR PARTY

...on January 30, [the Democrats] invited five constitutional law experts to testify before the Senate Judiciary Committee to ask them how they could end the war. Four out of five of the experts swore that the Democrats could stop the Iraq War just...like...that.

Why are so many respected journalists parroting the Democratic party line? I suspect that corporate media culture, rather than Judith Miller-style malfeasance, is largely to blame. Ink-stained newsrooms have been replaced by bullpen offices indistinguishable from those of banks or insurance companies. Reporters used to come from the working classes. They distrusted politicians and businessmen, and politicians and businessmen loathed them. Today's journalists are products of cookie-cutter journalism schools. Because graduate schools rarely offer scholarships, few come from the lower or middle classes. They look like businessmen. When they meet a politician, they see a possible friend. They wear suits and ties. And when a U.S. senator like Joe Biden feeds them a line of crap, they gobble it up.

CIA Blacked Out Knowledge from NIE Report

In a classified National Intelligence Estimate prepared before the Iraq war, the CIA hedged its judgments about Saddam Hussein and weapons of mass destruction, pointing up the limits of its knowledge.

But in the unclassified version of the NIE — the so-called white paper cited by the Bush administration in making its case for war — those carefully qualified conclusions were turned into blunt assertions of fact, according to the Senate Intelligence Committee's report on prewar intelligence.

In doing a little research for the last entry's comment reply, I re-found this article.

Go read it. The unclassified version of the National Intelligence Estimate referred to in the article was the main basis of reporting on the "threat" from Saddam before we invaded Iraq.

Simply, we were lied to.

Also simply, the Congress was not.

Get your heads around this: Congress was not given the unclassified ("cooked") version of the NIE. That was released to the press for them to disseminate to We The People. Congress got the unclassified version.

Yeah, all along, they knew. They knew there were real doubts about everything the administration (read: Dick Cheney) claimed about Iraq but they voted for war anyway. Oh sure, some voted for the Presidential power to make war and not explicitly for the war (like John Kerry claims). Anyone who tries to split that hair is full of shit.

So those members of Congress who pound the podiums and claim they were duped about Iraq are full of shit too. They knew.

Like the administration, they thought that supporting a slam-dunk war with Iraq would help them win re-election and more power.

So go read the article on the report of the Senate Intelligence Committee findings on the veracity of prewar intelligence. Then ask yourself if we were lied to. Then ask yourself the most important question - above and beyond whether a false case for war was made - ask yourself why no one involved with the lying has yet been investigated or punished.

Local News | FBI wants law targeting hats, sunglasses in banks

Special Agent Larry Carr plans to work with Washington state lawmakers on legislation that would forbid banks from doing business with customers who wear hats and sunglasses while inside the bank.

What about wigs? Suppose I wear a really shaggy wig? What if I grow unnaturally long eyebrows?

What happens if I suddenly put my hat on while at the teller window? Does the 80-year old guard draw his weapon and shoot me?

Carr's measure would not include bank customers who wear hats for religious or medical reasons.

And who is going to be the arbiter of religious law? The teller? "I'm sorry Mr. Shenklewitz, (gumsnap, hairflip). Out there you might be a Hasid but in my bank, you're a bare-headed Jew!"

Who determines the medical necessity of the hat? And how?

"Our lead story tonight: A 57-year old floppy-hatted Seattle woman was shot dead by a bank security guard after passing a note to a teller that the bank guard thought was a demand for money. The woman, recently discharged from Swedish Hospital in Ballard after brain surgery, was, in reality, showing the teller a note from her doctor allowing her to wear her floppy red hat inside banks. More from KEPO 7 news reporter, Sally Sweetgrass..."

The real solution is to only allow one person at a time into the bank. If the tellers are behind shatter-proof glass like the smiling clerks at the payday loan shark joint, there is no hope for a robbery.

Better yet, the bank can strap those drive-up window tube things to the backs of robot dogs and have all of their customers do their banking from the parking lot. This way, they can sell car loans to people who have to rent a car to drive to the bank parking lot in order to use the robot dog drive-up window tubes.

That's beautiful! You can't rob the bank because you can't get into the bank! You can't take hostages because everyone will just drive away! Sure, you have a getaway car already but you can't steal anything!

Simpson Named Suspect in Armed Robbery

Las Vegas Metro Police Capt. James Dillon said the confrontation was reported as an armed robbery involving guns. But he said no weapons had been recovered and stressed that the investigation was in its "infancy."

All I have to say is, this time they had better look in the god damned garbage cans!

Former Fed Chief Attacks Bush on Fiscal Role

“My friend,” he writes of [former Treasury secretary Paul H.] O’Neill, “soon found himself to be the odd man out; much to my disappointment, economic policymaking in the Bush administration remained firmly in the hands of the White House staff.”

He was clearly referring to the political team led by Karl Rove at the White House.

Still think Shrub is anything other than a well-heeled front man? They don't call Rove "Bush's Brain" for nuthin' ya know.

As more puppeteers and scriptwriters leave the administration, look for Bush to implode. For his whole life he's been able to call on others to save his bacon - from Daddy getting him into the reserves in Texas to Daddy's rich friends bailing him out of his failed business ventures to Daddy's rich friends paying his way into the Texas governorship and the White House.

But the good ship Bush is sinking again. With the man at the end of his power and influence, there's no good reason for anyone to start bailing.

Advertising Age - MediaWorks - Giuliani Also Gets Liberal Discount From Times

MoveOn told ABC's Jake Tapper that the group paid $65,000 for a Sept. 10 ad accusing General David Petraeus of "cooking the books for the White House" in his status reports on Iraq. The Times rate card implies that weekday, full-page, black-and-white cause, appeal or political ads cost $181,692.

And that's what the Giuliani campaign paid as well, according to one person close to the Times, for its counter ad today berating MoveOn and, in turn, Hillary Clinton for refusing to denounce the "Betray Us" ad.

In my favorite Daffy Duck cartoon, "Conrad The Sailor" (Warner Bros. 1942), Daffy torments Conrad (voiced by the fantastic Pinto Colvig who was also Disney's Goofy and the original Bozo the Clown) by, among other things, subbing a bucket of paint for Conrad's mop bucket.

Drawing Conrad's attention to the huge swath of paint-swabbed deck behind him, Daffy says, "Very sloppy, Roscoe. You're a slovenly housekeeper."

And that's what this story about MoveOn and Rudy will forever be: a case of slovenly reportage. Sure, Advertising Age is reporting the truth, that nobody got their back scratched in the deal for the MoveOn ad, but how many people will ever read the AdAge "correction"?

Instead, Ma and Pa from Peoria will forever see the Times and MoveOn as bedfellows.

This is not to say that things never work in the other direction and that mis- and disinformation about right-wing groups never gets corrected satisfactorily.

This is to say, though, that Big Media is woefully neglectful of printing simple truths where anything political is involved.

Swift and wide reportage of the fact that the Giuliani camp was flat out wrong would have been the right thing to do. It would have stopped the intent of the Giuliani ad - to water down MoveOn's opinion and it would have proven that the Media is there to do something besides take money for ad space.

Trial to start in Miami for alleged terror cell accused of plotting to destroy Sears Tower

"I want to fight some jihad."

Apparently without enough real meat on its plate, the FBI has taken to fomenting terrorism.

"Hey Bob. Got anything that would make the Bureau look good today?"

"Not really. We tried getting a grandmother from Oswego to steal some Geritol and take it Cuba but she left the bottle at the Piggly-Wiggly checkout counter."

"Geritol?"

"Aiding a terrorist regime."

"Ah! Beauty! Did she ever make it to Cuba? We can pump that one a bit, you know."

"Well, we got a little crossed up with that info there. Echelon returned an email about Cuba and her travel dates but it turns out that she was setting up a date with a friend to see Daddy Day Camp."

"Daddy Day Camp?"

"Cuba Gooding."

"Crap. Nothing else?

"Well we have these seven morons in Miami who have a gun and a couple of machetes. The leader, codenamed 'Moe Howard', has said he wants to fight some jihad."

"He said it? Just like that? 'I want to fight some jihad'?"

"Yeah. Kind of like that little dog used to say 'I want my Taco Bell'. What ever happened to that dog? The wife used to laugh and laugh at that thing."

"Well, let's go with jihad boy. Send over a couple of leeches and see if we can get them to chant "death to Bush" or something. And film it. The networks will run it for us."

"How about we get these bozos to pledge allegiance to al Qeada?"

"That would be great! See if they can say something bad about Miss America, too."

"All right."

"Let's roll!"

Simpson friend: It seemed like a setup - Yahoo! News

"O.J. said, 'You've got stolen property. Either you return it or I call the police.'"

That's my "Dancing With The Stars" rejection letter. That's my copy of "How To Meet People At Wedding Cocktail Parties And Get Them To Rob Others While Armed". Thems my Ginsu knives...

US Resumes Blackwater Convoys in Iraq

U.S. Embassy spokeswoman Mirembe Nantongo said the decision to resume land travel outside the heavily fortified Green Zone was made after consultations with the Iraqi governments. She said the convoys will be limited to essential missions.

Oh, come on, Ms. Nantongo! We all know that even after 6 years of fighting, 4,000 dead Americans, tens of thousands of dead Iraqis and a trillion dollars plundered from our children's future earnings, no Westerner can move freely outside of the Green Zone in the enemy's capital city without having either a death wish or an escort.

"Essential missions" my ass. Everything American is inside of the Green Zone. From McDonald's to Playboy magazine. It's a small-scale U.S. city. It's not like American personnel were running out for tea at Al-Be-Teaing-You. "Essential" missions are the only reason anyone ever leaves the Green Zone.

The current situation - and the other unwarranted killings by these thugs - is what happens when you take a bunch of ex-military types who couldn't leave their "mall security" black BDUs behind and make it in the real world, give them millions in dark budget money and remove their trigger-happy fingers from the constraint of legal accountability either to the laws of the country they're in or the country that contracted their mercenary services.

And Happy Friday to the rest of you.

Beloved Seattle historian Walt Crowley dies

Local historian and journalist Walt Crowley died at the age of 59 on Friday night after succumbing to complications from cancer surgery. He is said to have been peaceful and surrounded by loved ones at the time of his death.

Crowley , who co-founded HistoryLink.org, the online encyclopedia of Washington state history, was diagnosed with laryngeal cancer in July 2005 after suffering years of chronic throat problems.

Talk about serving the community.

Walt Crowley was one of those rare people who not only "served the community" but also served Seattle's sense of community.

This city has a reputation for being chilly, socially. We very often tear down meaningful things in order to put up meaningless crap that fakes the look of what was torn down. Being a young city, it is very difficult for residents here (nearly half of them originally from somewhere else - like me) to grasp any sense of history.

Walt Crowley taught us our history. He worked to preserve it and, as a result, truly served Seattle's sense of community.

His life reads like a how-to guide to living an outwardly-projected life. He did what was best for others without seeking the praise for his triumphs.

I urge everyone who lurks here to click on the link and read the obit article.

It is a grayer morning in Seattle for the loss of Walt Crowley.

Giant ads set for world's busiest runways

Advertisers aiming to reach high-flyers with no alternative distraction will soon have a new method: adverts the size of three football pitches seen by plane passengers coming in to land.

Paul Jenkins, managing director of Ad-Air, said the adverts would appear in "clutter-free environments and moments free of any other commercial messages."

Land On! Apply directly to the runway!
Land On! Apply directly to the runway!
Land On! Apply directly to the runway!

::::::::::::::::::::

McDonalds is negotiating for the rights to pass ads instead of your life before your eyes during runway crashes.

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If your landing
Has been hairy
Don't let your chin
Become that scary
Burma Shave

Or, more likely:

IfyourlandingHasbeenhairyDon'tletyourchinBecomethatscaryBurmaShave

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Coffee?

Tea?

Or

BVD?

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FBI faces deep cuts in programs to fight crime

The Bush administration's 2008 budget cuts deeply into the FBI's crucial criminal program, further crippling the bureau's ability to tackle white-collar fraud, police abuse, civil rights violations and many other crimes, a Seattle P-I analysis has found.

Well, I guess the Republicans know who their constituents are...

But the Democratic majority's spending plan -- under the ever-present threat of a presidential veto -- restores only a small fraction of the FBI agents needed to keep the criminal program at current levels.

The Democrat's slogan for the 2008 elections is Democrats - Doing The Bare Minimum!

Through accounting sleight of hand, President Bush's plan concentrates the loss of thousands of unfilled staff positions across the FBI on its criminal program by transferring hundreds more agents to counter-terrorism operations -- continuing a trend that started after 9/11.

How can they say it was "accounting sleight of hand"? The President can't even pronounce that!

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Leave it to the Bushies to come to the conclusion that the reason we were attacked by terrorists was because we had too few criminals.

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"Hello? FBI? I want to report a civil rights violation."

"This is a recording. Your call is important to us. Please stay on the line until the next available agent can come to your aid. Your call is important to us. The number of citizens now being aided in front of you is...twelve. hundred. and. fifty. two.

To hear a list of helpful tips on how to avoid calling the FBI, press 1 now. To hear Agent Hartsdale sing "Moon River", press 2 now. To report suspicions concerning your swarthy neighbor who lives in a tiny 5th floor walkup, cooks odd-smelling food and reads foreign-language newspapers, please hang up and call The Other FBI at 555-555-5555. TOFBI hotline currently has a wait of... minus. twenty. minutes. to take your call. Otherwise, please stay on the line."

"click"

As Prices Soar, U.S. Food Aid Buys Less - New York Times
Congress is considering changes to the food aid program as part of the omnibus farm bill that some economists and advocates for the hungry say would improve the efficiency of the program and allow it to feed more people. They point to a Bush administration proposal that would allow the government to use up to $300 million of the food aid budget to buy food in African countries close to hunger emergencies rather than shipping it from the United States on mainly American-flagged vessels as current law requires.

“None of us will be working toward that,” she said.

Credit where it's due: The Bush proposal is spot-on. So now it's time for Democrats to lobby their leaders in Congress to support that proposal in spite of the deep-pocket pressure of agri-business and the shipping companies.

Gloria Tosi, although I doubt her name will ever come up again, has officially earned the nick Wicked Witch of the West. Scummy crumbs like her should be put out of their jobs.

Imagine having the ice to say that Americans would reduce their support for feeding hungry children based upon where the food aid is purchased! I thought the Wicked Witch of The West was dead!

Not only will food purchased nearer the point of need be more economical for the U.S., it will also benefit the economies of those countries where the food is purchased. It's win-win for the poor and hungry. More importantly the food purchased locally, near the point of need, will be better suited to the nutritional needs of those being fed!

You've all seen the pictures of reconstituted powdered milk being slopped out into cups for hungry African children, right? Well, like Asians, Africans lack the enzyme in their systems to break down the lactose in bovine milk products. So we give the kiddies cow milk and, like anyone else who is lactose intolerant, they get the runs from it which leads to dehydration and they die despite all of the money we spend feeding them!

It's largely the same for the grains and other things we send overseas. As was recently reported, the nutritional values in the stuff the huge agricultural conglomerates are growing is nose-diving. We tolerate the nearly nutritionally void garbage grown by big American agri-bussiness corporations (because we spend umpteen-bazillion in health care costs to keep ourselves alive) but the people we send it to, being used to more nutritious fare, can't get the proper nutrition from the same size portions.

To recap:

* The Bushies are right about this one.
* The Democrats need to get off their asses and concur, write the legislation and feed the hungry children of the world.
* The shipping companies and giant agri-corpos need to stop profiteering off of poor people's hunger.
* Gloria Tosi is an asshole.

Lost in the consuming tension of "Dancing With The Stars", overlooked by a nation too busy with the vapidity of their endless cell phone conversations and Internet celebrity gossip, ignored by a generation tuned out to the world on their insipid iPods, humanity cries out.

Baghdad Burning

How is it that only a stretch of several kilometers and maybe twenty minutes, so firmly segregates life from death?

How is it that a border no one can see or touch stands between car bombs, militias, death squads and… peace, safety? It’s difficult to believe- even now. I sit here and write this and wonder why I can’t hear the explosions.

and Steps to freedom (Free Burma Rangers)