I haven't had a vacation in two years.

Except for when I'm at work, I haven't had any "cave time" away from Miss Significantly Other since she's been out of work for nearly the same amount of time.

Sure, she was on Maui for two weeks but that was so long ago that I can't remember when it was.

And I think I cleaned while she was away so that doesn't hardly count.

A cave in the mountains is looking pretty damned inviting right now. If it weren't for the fact that bear are holing up around this time in just such caves, I'm ight be tempted to stike out for one. If I knew whewre one was. Cave, I mean. Not bear. Who wants to knwo where the bears are? I mean for caving purposes. I mean for resdieing in one.

Ah, shit. Forget it.

I can see the end of the rope.

And it ain't pretty.